I generally try to avoid talking about my "real life" on the blog, but I think it's pertinent.
Anyway, I found out just a little while ago that I was going to have to re-apply for my current job. In truth, I'd rather NOT stay in this job, and my fingers are crossed that another potential job pans out, but hey, whatever.
I had the interview, which went well. I mean, we're not talking about hypothetical situations. I know what works and what doesn't work there. And then I got a call telling me that I'd have a call-back...at which time I was told what sorts of things I should say if I want to keep my job.
And frankly, I HATE that shit. I hate being told what to do. I really, really hate it. I know what needs to be said! I know what's right for me.
What does this have to do with my blog? I think this is part of why I don't diet well...and why even Intuitive Eating fails me sometimes. I do NOT do well with rigid rules and mandates. I don't like being told, in essence, that I can't be trusted to do the right thing.
I've had about three days of struggling. I know I'm not hungry, but I eat. And every time, I sort of feel like I'm thumbing my nose at Geneen Roth ("Screw you, lady! I'll eat what I want!"). Even though overeating doesn't make me feel good.
Isn't that childish?